Shape your brain, shape your Universe
If you sometimes find it hard to ask for what you think you deserve in return for what you offer, from your close people or your customers, this message is for you.
If it is easy to ask for what you deserve, this message is for those friends of yours, whom you might want to help make faster progress toward prosperity.
Perhaps you sometimes decided not to ask for money from friends or family members when you did for them what you normally do as a job. “For you, I will do it for free. It doesn’t you anything.” “I know you can’t pay me, for you I do this for free, I help you.”
You may have happened to very difficultly ask for a sum of money for what you brought of value to your customers. “How can I ask you money for this?! I just do it so naturally.”
Or, suppose you decided to sell more expensively. And this time you really want to succeed. You finally decided to ask for a larger sum, which you really believe in the depth of your soul you deserve. You prepared for the discussion. You presented the product or service very well, added value to the conversation, and when it was time to state the price …
took a breath in…
thought about the high price…
you had a second of hesitation and…
you uttered the lower price.
That price your brain is accustomed to and that your subconscious approved. That price your subconscious thought you deserved.
In each of the above situations you find symptoms of unfair exchanges, the causes of which you will find below.
In any relationship, whether it’s business or personal relationships, there is a fair exchange. Fair exchange means you have the perception that what you offer is balanced with what you get. Namely, you perceive that there is a balance between giving and receiving. That means you feel that you have received as much money as you deserve for your product or service, directly proportionate with the value you bring to your customers and the effort you make to serve them.
If you offer something free of charge to a person and you don’t let them return the favour, you created an imbalance.
The universe will seek to compensate for this imbalance and the person will pay in one form or another for what they received free of charge. Thus, in this lifetime, payments such as: they lose something, they are stolen something, they have an accident, they get a bigger bill, they find their car scratched, they get sick or miss something important, etc.
For example, once, a customer received a holiday voucher in a superb home on an island as a gift. Nice, isn’t it? Then, when he returned from his vacation, his wallet was stolen, in which he had the same amount he would have paid for the rent of the holiday house. Thus, he eventually paid for what he received free of charge.
If you offer your services free of charge, and you do not appreciate and respect the customer enough to achieve a fair exchange, you create a “payment” that you do not control. A loss, which actually means balance at the level of the person, between giving and receiving.
If you honour and respect your customer enough to generate a fair exchange by asking them for money for your services, you close the transaction on the spot and balance is achieved. The client will not receive any other balancing from the Universe.
There are two main causes for which someone does not ask for money on what they offer:
1. The person has feelings of guilt and shame. These emotions are like programs, in the subconscious, which tell you that you don’t deserve being paid.
2. The person is putting on a pedestal the one to whom they offer the services for free. And seeking their favour, they offer them gratuities.
Each of these two causes can be compensated and you can easily exit this loop. It is a simple process.
To have fair exchanges, honor your customers, and ask them for money for what you offer. Show your respect for them, confident they can live up to the level of the fair exchange you propose and are able to honour their part of the transaction. “You trust them that they can.” And trust yourself.
Shape your brain, shape your Universe
P.S. Suppose you got something free and want to restore the balance. Then: 1. make a list of what you did to deserve those services, namely list all the benefits you have brought to the person who gave you the gratuity. 2. Write a sum of money for every benefit you have brought to them. 3. Continue until the value you brought is the value you received for free.
P.P.S. In the image below, you will find a note I got from a client with whom I worked on dissolving feelings of guilt and shame.